Elizabeth ‘Lizzie’ Vaughan
– a colourful, celebratory LGBTQ+ funeral
‘My sister’s death was a shock to us all but the staff at Rosedale cared for us and understood we needed to be with her daily. They did the LGBTQ+ community proud and I cannot rate them high enough for their compassion, empathy and wonderful care.’
Lizzie’s sister
In 2018 we were entrusted with the care of Lizzie Vaughan, a proud transgender lady.
It was important to the family to spend as much time as possible with Lizzie leading up to the funeral, something we were able to achieve, with daily visits right up until the funeral.
The family wanted Lizzie’s funeral to reflect her larger than life character, so we worked with the family to ensure this was the case. ‘Sing With Pride’, a Norwich based choir that Lizzie was part of, attended and sung ‘Dancing Queen’. Bright colours were encouraged, and we were able to wear our alternative uniform with colourful, rainbow ties, to ensure that everyone reflected the colourful theme. Vibrant flowers.
Elizabeth ‘Lizzie’ Vaughan – words by her sister, Katie
‘Nearly four years ago my sister passed and it was Rosedale Funeral Home we entrusted her care to. My sister was male to female transgender, and from the very start they couldn’t have been more accommodating. My sister was big, bold, bright and loud, therefore we wanted a big bright LGBTQ+ send off for her – and Rosedale did her proud, even wearing rainbow ties and big smiles (no sadness).’
‘Sing With Pride’:
‘Lizzie’s family gave her the most wonderful funeral and we were proud to perform to say goodbye to our beloved friend. It was such a delight when everyone joined in with the recording of “Dancing Queen” which was always one of Lizzie’s favourite songs to sing at choir.’
John Groom
– a highly bespoke funeral attended by many people
‘He was a wonderful local figure, a man of great warmth and determination who dedicated much of his life to local people and communities. John’s passing will leave a huge hole in many lives and Waveney will be a poorer place without him.’
Councillor Mark Bee, Leader of Waveney District Council at the time
Known as ‘Mr Bungay’, John was a pillar of the local community. He had his own business in town and helped many people celebrate their special days, from weddings to wakes, and everything in-between.
John’s family wanted a funeral that truly reflected his life, and allowed all those that knew him to attend the funeral.
It was a cold and misty January morning when John was taken to St. Mary’s Church, Bungay, via his shop, by a horse drawn hearse pulled by one of his great loves, his own Suffolk Punch horses. The family travelled in one of our limousines to ensue that they could travel in comfort, and without worry.
We had arranged a PA system at the church to ensure that all those attending could hear the service, and a local photographer, Wendy Aiken, captured special moments whilst remaining respectful of the situation. Our gentlemen encouraged those attending to write their names and messages on our ‘Taking of Names’ inserts so that they family had a keepsake from the day.
Many people attended the wake at The Fisher Theatre which John loved, and a slideshow of photographs from his life was a focal point.
It was a truly unique funeral, for a truly unique, and much loved man.
Dorothy ‘Dot’ Roe
– a simple, intimate and personal funeral
“Despite those choices deemed as wrong by my closest friend and family member I wouldn’t change a thing if we had our time again”
Dot’s daughter
Dot’s daughter contacted us when her mum became unwell so that she could talk through her funeral wishes to see if they were possible, and to also find out what to expect when the time came, and this helped to relieve a lot of the worries and concerns that she had.
Dot was a very special lady, meticulously dressed and very glamourous. She adored flowers (especially lily-of-the-valley), the colour pink and was loved by many people, especially by her daughter and husband.
Unfortunately, due to effects of dementia, Dot’s husband was struggling to process, and grieve, the loss of his wife. It was therefore really important to her daughter that the service was small and intimate, so that he could attend, and they could reflect upon her life in a quiet and meaningful way. Although there were people telling her that this wasn’t ‘normal’ or ‘the done thing’, Dot’s daughter knew that she was honouring her mum’s wishes, and was doing what was right for her and her dad.
On the day of the funeral we took Dot home one last time, leaving the from the house that she loved so much. A beautiful floral arrangement reflected her love of flowers and our bearing team wore pink ties to further personalise the funeral. The celebrant led a beautiful service which allowed time for reflection without feeling rushed. Following the service there was a wake at a location special to the family near to where Dot lived and was attended by friends and family who lived locally came together to share memories of Dot & celebrate her long & happy life.
Dot’s funeral was simple, personal and very special – and completely right for her and her family.
Roger Foulger
– a memorial service and ashes interment following an unattended cremation
“As a family we chose this route as it allowed us to all come together on one particular date and celebrate the life of our late father. On that day, his ashes were present, and we felt we could lay his ashes to rest and say our final goodbyes.”
Roger’s daughter
Roger’s death was sudden and the family were not sure on what they wanted for the funeral arrangements as although they were drawn to an unattended funeral, they also wanted a way in which to celebrate Roger’s life.
After spending time with us to talk through all the options, they decided on an unattended cremation, but with a Celebration of Life and interment of ashes to follow a few days later.
The service was was held in Thetford Cemetery Chapel, with flowers, music and Roger’s ashes present at the front. Civil Celebrant and bereavement group facilitator, Beverley Bulmer, delivered the service which was special and intimate, Following this we walked to his final resting place and interred his ashes.
Quite often people choose to have an unattended funeral, but those left behind can really struggle to process their grief because there is no ‘goodbye’. Having a memorial service afterwards is another option for people in which they can fulfil the wishes of their loved one, but also fulfil their own needs.