8. Sarah’s Blog

At Rosedale Funeral Home, we understand that grief is a deeply personal journey, shaped by many different factors. Sarah’s blog is where the many aspects of bereavement are explored —offering insights into how loss can affect us. From practical guidance and reflections on coping with grief, to stories and perspectives that may bring comfort, Sarah’s Blog, and our bereavement support groups in Norfolk and Suffolk aim to support you every step of the way.

Grief and the holiday season

As I write, the school summer holidays have just begun. Roads, airports and ferry terminals will no doubt be packed as usual!

Wildfires are raging in parts of Europe and the UK due to the soaring temperatures and lack of any substantial rain. This does not seem to deter those determined to enjoy their annual summer getaway.

For those who are bereaved, holidays may feel very different, especially when a partner has died.

When someone dies there are many loses. The Primary loss is the death of the person themselves but there are also many other Secondary losses. The types of losses felt will vary, depending on the relationship with that person. For example, when a close parent dies, the adult child may feel they have lost their best friend, advisor, mentor or shoulder to cry on in a crisis. Of course, not all relationships are easy or loving and loss can sometimes feel like guilt or regret about an estranged or fractured relationship.

When a partner dies, it is often the practical everyday losses that hit the hardest, due to constant everyday reminders. That person may have played many different roles in the relationship, such as cook, cleaner, gardener etc. They may have been the one to take the bins out, to fix a broken curtain rail or take the car for its annual MOT. Suddenly being responsible for all household tasks can feel extremely overwhelming.

Where there are children to care for, this now becomes the sole responsibility of the surviving parent which can be a heavy burden to bear.
Many bereaved people say the biggest loss is often companionship- someone to watch TV with, talk about the day over dinner or go on holiday with. It is often the simple things we miss, such as making plans together, deciding what to eat for the week ahead or even just being together in companionable silence.

Though we can never replace that special person and the roles they played in our life, it can be helpful to think about who else could help to fill some of the gaps left behind. Perhaps there is a single friend who would also like to go on holiday or for a day trip? When a family member offers help with odd jobs or gardening, take them up on their offer. If you belong to a supportive church, friendship circle or community group, accept those invitations for coffee or lunch or maybe initiate an invitation yourself? Maybe contact an old friend you haven’t seen in a while and suggest a meet up. Helping and supporting others can also provide purpose and ease the loneliness and isolation of grief.
It may feel difficult at first but strengthening and developing our existing networks and building new ones can provide emotional support, practical help, companionship and connection.

When we have lost someone who brought so much to our life, connecting with others in a meaningful way can help to ease the burden of grief.

If you would like to join one of our bereavement groups in your area, visit rosedalefuneralhome.co.uk or call any one of our branches for more information. All groups are free and confidential.

Rosedale’s bereavement support groups provide a safe, trusted place to talk about bereavement and  be listened to. Call  01379 640 810  to reserve your free place on the next group.